Love

Thoughts on this topic have been running around in my brain recently, and I have been wanting to write this entry for a while. Growing up is a funny/interesting/painful/wonderful inevitability. My favorite part about it is figuring out why I act and react the way I do to certain things, which in turn allows me to more fully understand why others act and react the way they do towards certain things.

The thoughts and knee-jerk reactions I have previously had regarding "Love" have recently been exposed and placed in the center ring for no one else but me, myself, and I to watch passively and note the horrific disfunction.

Mind blowing discovery #1: Love is not something to fear, or to fear the loss of. This seems like common sense, obviously. However, it is human nature to want what we cannot have. To hold onto that which is scarce. Love is not a supply-demand kind of business. Love should be always abundant. Not smothering, but active, aware.

Love is not tumultuous - it is peaceful, and that serenity comes from confidence in oneself and in the relationship. I can't tell you how many times I have made excuses and convinced myself that I was the one who was wrong for feeling upset, disappointed, or left high and dry. Its almost as if people love and thrive off of the drama, the pull and the abuse of a "relationship." At least they have something to vent about to their friends (or on a blog, haha).

Here's a bible verse that you have probably heard read at nearly every wedding you've ever attended; rightfully so, because it rings true, now, for me, more than ever.

"Love is patient, Love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast.

It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,

and endures all things."

Corinthians 13:4-7

Organized Chaos

Does anyone else find it peculiar that we all are assigned a name and a number? Quite a few numbers at that. Starting the second we arrive on this planet, the government catalogues our existence with a number. "United States Citizen Number 795-xxx-xxxx." When taking into account the miracle (or complex scientific coincidence, however you may choose to look at it) that is life, it seems rather neanderthal to attempt to file it as just another occurrence. Then we get a bit older, and we get a drivers license, earn a degree, accumulate medical records, bank statements, credit histories, etc - all of which are carefully documented. So much paperwork is involved in being a functioning human, its exhausting to think about, and makes vagrancy almost sound appealing... And yet, we have all accepted this as "the way things are," because of what? Fear? That people would run wild in the streets if a piece of cardboard with a number on it didn't hold them to a certain standard of conduct? What would happen if people were just people, and not a stack of paperwork, telling them who they were? I think there would be more creativity, for one. Chaos: maybe. Things would certainly be a lot more interesting.